When a friendship ends

[XOMiss_Samantha]

erk. It's hard in life to find your really really good friends some times. In 8th grade my best friend for 6 years decided for no reason NOT to be my friend anymore. Of course it was hard to deal with, but eventually I came to realise that there are better people in life. I am happy now, and have much better memories with other people than I ever had with her. We sometimes talk, which is good because I hate loosing contact, but I don't forgive her for what she did and how upset she made me. Although, It's probably a good thing we stopped talking, because if that haden't happened then I would never be so close with the friends I now have, who I know will always be there for me.

 

[Weatherman]

Sometimes friendships just waste away. It happeens, even if you see each other alot. People change, not always for the better. Sometimes someone just does not want to be associated with a particular person anymore because they rimind them of someone else, or that person has changed in a way they don't like, or the ex friend has changed their priorities.

And sometimes friendships implode in a spectacular structural failure due to outside preasure or unrequited feelings. Those really suck.

 

[Majin_Megabyte]

Yeah, true I only remember one friend ship that ended for me. It was sad in a way, because he was one of my closets friend I ever have. Me and him still talk everyone once awhile, but he have pretty much different interest now.

 

[Zach Logan]

Sometimes friendships just waste away. It happeens, even if you see each other alot. People change, not always for the better. Sometimes someone just does not want to be associated with a particular person anymore because they rimind them of someone else, or that person has changed in a way they don't like, or the ex friend has changed their priorities.

And sometimes friendships implode in a spectacular structural failure due to outside preasure or unrequited feelings. Those really suck.

Yeah, that happened to me with a lot of people from high school. When you move apart it takes a lot more effort not to drift apart. You have to work to keep your friends.

 

[Robin2099]

I've had a lot of friendships end. Granted none have been major blow outs, but most of the time it was just we moved on into diffrent directions in our lives. I remember there was a girl I was friends with who used to hang out with my friends(we were all one big grioup) then she went away to college, meet people there and basically talked about how great and wonderful her friends were there. At the time it really depressed me, but eventually I realized that things change. It's evolution that we change, and outgrow or loose contact with people. You just have to except it and move on.

 

[Mr. Pedro]

I suppose I've been fortunate up to this point to rarely have a friendship end in any traumantic or hostile way (then again, maybe I haven't had enough "friends" in order for such things to happen). Honestly, having people "drift" away doesn't bother me too much as we all have different lives and some distance is to be expected.

With all that said, I've grown fond of the company that I've sorta cultivated over the last two years or so. Only time will tell if those relationships will be able to sustain themselves for the long haul, but I do intend to do my part to makes things work.

 

[Leaping Larry Jojo]

Generally, I'm willing to bet 99% of the people here on this board have experienced losing a friendship at some point in their lives. I've had one that ended up in a blowup, but for the most part they ended simply because our lives went in different directions.

Maintaining friendships is hard, and I hate to say it, but the older you get, the more it feels like work.

 

[Hanshotfirst1138]

Yeah, I've had people come in and out of my life several times. It's a strange feeling. Sometimes people just go different ways, sometimes there are arguments, it all depends. It really defines you as a person, good, bad or indifferent. I thought I was going through something similar recently; now I'm not so sure. But anyways, best of luck. God knows, it's hard.

 

[Kury Wagner]

Maintaining friendships is hard, and I hate to say it, but the older you get, the more it feels like work.

I wonder if that isn't because you begin to rely on having people in your life more, but they're not just there for the claiming. You have to work for company. As you shift from needing/being around family into your own life, there's a need to replace those beings with someone else, maybe.

 

[Vermunium]

I wonder if that isn't because you begin to rely on having people in your life more, but they're not just there for the claiming. You have to work for company. As you shift from needing/being around family into your own life, there's a need to replace those beings with someone else, maybe.

Where to begin on that subject. I need company. I can't stand to be by myself. my self esteem levels drop horrendously when I spend too much time by myself, mainly due to the fact that I second guess myself on what everyone thinks about me. I have to work for company, because if I don't, everyone else will be too busy doing other things.

 

[Dead_Ninja_111]

I used to have a 'best friend' for maybe 2 - 3 years. We met in high school and just hung out all the time. Then one day we just stoped hanging out and thats it. I saw him a few times afterwards but we just drifted apart.

I feel like that's gonna happen to me too after high school. oh well..

 

[Leaping Larry Jojo]

I've only recently come to realize the benefits of elementary and high school, because when you see the same people every day, it's much easier for you to get to know people, and the comfort level is better. In college and university, at least from my experience, you don't see the same people every day. Most of my courses are only once or twice a week, and that's simply not enough time for someone who's not as extroverted as some are.

I've met many people since I graduated from high school, but I can't say I've built a lot of close friendships since then. On the other hand, I'm sure I'm not the only one in this situation.

The problem is that as we get older, we crave company more than ever, but at the same time we're not as open to people as we were when we were 12.

 

[FireWarrior]

I've only recently come to realize the benefits of elementary and high school, because when you see the same people every day, it's much easier for you to get to know people, and the comfort level is better. In college and university, at least from my experience, you don't see the same people every day. Most of my courses are only once or twice a week, and that's simply not enough time for someone who's not as extroverted as some are.

I've met many people since I graduated from high school, but I can't say I've built a lot of close friendships since then. On the other hand, I'm sure I'm not the only one in this situation.

The problem is that as we get older, we crave company more than ever, but at the same time we're not as open to people as we were when we were 12.

Couldn't have said it better myself. Since I've got to college I can only say that I have made 4 really good friendships. Yeah I've met a lot of people but like you said I don't see them everyday so keeping in touch and hanging out becomes harder.

I've had friendships end but never in a bad way. More like they just drift apart or I've been in college for too long. Sucks though because my brother and I used to hang out with a bunch of high school sophomores (bro was a junior and I was a senior) a lot. Now that I'm a sophomore in college and my bro a freshman in college, we don't get to see them that often and they seem to have drift away and made new friends. Not too bad because that's life, but those are friendships I sure hope to hang on for the rest of my life.

 

[The Guitar Slayer]

My boyfriend was my best friend. We continued to be so even after he dumped me after a bit more than a year of being together. However, when he got a new girlfriend, he cut me off from his life. I was replaced. Easily.

To say the least, it's taken a lot out of me. I can't say that I'm totally OK yet. Working on it. The way it happened, it sort of devalued me as a human being, which is never fun, I think.

 

[Hanshotfirst1138]

Man, this thread is depressing, philophical, deep, profound, sad, personal, and interesting.

 

[entransify]

It's really hard to find a friendship in real life AND keep it.

I had nobody throughout my entire life until senior year in high school. Once the year was over, I was out of touch with them and still am. I've found a few of them on Facebook and Myspace, but I'm left with the feeling they won't remember me or something.

 

[Ajax]

Friendships come and go all the time, it takes something special to sustain a friendship for a very long time. Thankful to say that ive still kept most of my friends but im not so naviee to believe that my friends will be my friends forever. And i never seem to have falling outs when it comes to homeboys, only when girls are involved does the friendship ever end bad. Werid......

 

[Ren]

I've had so many friendships end that I feel as though I can detect the exact moment the relationship dies as it happens. It's a weird, sinking feeling. I've felt it three times now, and know that I'll probably feel it again.

Part of why my friendships have ended was that when I was little my dad was in the military. I'm sure some kids have moved and kept in touch, but I have no idea how. I got used to getting a new best friend every 2 or 3 years.

Then, when my dad retired and we stayed one place for 7 years I was still in the habit of growing apart after a couple years.

My most recent friendship funeral sounded a lot like Mek's story, just without the money and the argument. I was always showing up to do things with this friend on her schedule, I was the one calling her, I sent all the e-mails. I realized it was over. I just never contacted her again. Most people would notice that someone whom they saw or heard from at least once a week was nowhere to be found, but she didn't. We haven't spoken in 18 months. I don't care. Even though I was friends with her the longest, my record at 4 and a half years. Oh well.